Zev
by urbanmanatee
Summary: Elissa Cousland has kept something from Zevran Ariani for fourteen years...


**I do not own Dragon Age, I just play it too much. This is my first fanfic, and my first time using this site. I apologize in advance for any spelling or grammar errors. Also that the chapters are in my story, not actual chapters. I promise I'll learn! Thanks!**

 **-UM**

CHAPTER 1

The pair strolled through the city, obvious outsiders, the women had black hair with blue eyes that rivaled the sea, skin so pale that the moon should be jealous. And although she was rather small in stature she carried herself and her twin daggers strapped to her back with confidence, poise (not something seen often in this part of town), and a hint of something dangerous. The boy was different tanner than the women, taller as well, although she was 13 years older. His pointed years were enough to give away his Elvan heritage, he had short blond hair, striking blue eyes that matched hers, and twin daggers identical to the women's.

Many watched with skeptical eyes as they wondered through the market stalls, speaking with many, purchasing small goods. It wasn't the fact that they were different that made people wary, a port town was used to different, it was the secrecy, the way that neither would give out their name, it was their expensive armor that was clearly made of dragon scale, it was the hood that shrouded the man's face. Even with the mystery that surrounded them only one knew that the way they moved through the small market place was tactical, they were searching for someone. Or she was, to be precise, the boy was along for the ride, stepping out of earshot when the women asked him to, but never out of eyesight. He was beyond the age to need supervision, but she was worried. It was apparent to the one that watched them, a man that has known her for many years, it was the way she oriented herself to the boy, always scanning the crowd for potential threats, her nose would crinkle slightly and her pinky finger would twitch when something was amiss. He could always tell when she was displeased, her entire morning and much of the afternoon was filled with nose crinkling, finger twitching moments, she played the tourist well though, too many of her years were spent hiding behind a mask for her to forget her training now, especially in an unknown city with a person she obviously cared much for by her side.

A twinge of jealousy ran through him as he watched them together, they were not intimate, of that he was certain, he could tell by their body language but it was the way she would laugh with him, a laugh that not only lit up her eyes, but lit up her entire body like a beacon, a laugh that he swore he could hear, even from across the market, a laugh that she used to reserve only for him. Yes, he was jealous.

"Who is this man?!" he said to no one, "She did this on purpose, I am sure of it."

 _I simply cannot take this, I need to know,_ he thought to himself, _Is he a friend, a guide, a family member…who is he..._ And then a thought hit him like well-aimed punch to the kidneys, a thought that nearly doubled him over in pain. "Is he a son? Has she loved another?"

"Mother we've been walking around this terrible city for hours, I smell of leather, putrid fish, and whatever passes for perfume at the brothels, you told me your friend would show by now.", the boy complained.

A sigh left her lips as she answered, "I know my son, and he will show soon, I am sure of it. If not today, tomorrow at the latest."

"How can you know that mother? He probably doesn't know we are here."

"Because if I know him as well as I used to, not only does he know we are here, but he has been fallowing us since we arrived." She said with a small smile. "Come on Zev," she said while pointing at a large sign, "it has been a trialing day, and it seems we've found that inn the pie merchant sent us to."

With a quick glance back, she led her son through the heavy wooden doors.

CHAPTER 2

It was a beautiful morning so far, the gulls were flying high, the tide perfect and only a few wispy clouds in sight. The Captain was barking orders when she saw him. "Well, well, well...look who the city vomited up and dropped on my ship, Zevran Ariani."

"Ahh my beautiful Isabela, how you wound me so." With an exaggerated bow he replied, "But alas it is I, Zevran Ariani, the one and only"

With a knowing smirk and chuckle the captain regarded the man in front of her, he has changed little. Same blond hair that reached his shoulders, half tied back with a leather lace, the same hard, sexy body, the same arrogance, the same small smirk, the same dead eyes. It was always a bit strange to talk to Zevran Ariani he spoke animatedly, he spoke as if his life was perfect, he spoke as though being an assassin and the son of a whore wasn't a lonely existence, but his eyes spoke a different story. His eyes showed pain, suffering, it spoke of a soul that was tortured, one that would always be broken.

Despite what many thought Isabela was not uncaring, she had few friends but they were hers, and anyone who hurt them she would hunt down, slip in and slit their throats. Zevran was one of those friends, and she would do almost anything to see a little bit of light enter back into his eyes. The only times she has ever seen him show any happiness was while he was following Elissa, funny a task that should have ended in death brought him the most happiness in his life. Which is why she is here, ported in Antiva waiting for the emotional shit-storm to start. _Ohh Zevran,_ she though. _I hope you're ready for this…_

"You don't fool me Zevran, you would have waited until I was tits deep in ale for a social visit. What do you want?"

"Yes, to the point then", Zevran replied, secretly happy that he didn't have to exchange any more pleasantries with Isabela. "You remember Elissa, yes? Hero of Ferelden, you met her at The Pearl, you taught her to be a duelist?"

"Oh yes…tight body, perky breasts, long black hair, a feisty, sexy little thing, what of her?"

"Do you know who she is with? Why she is trapesing all over Antiva City looking for me?

"Although I haven't seen who she is with I'm guessing it's a man seeing as how you can't keep the jealousy off your face", Isabella said while smiling at him. Her face fell as the man in front of her started pacing, running his hands through his hair like he was going to rip it out at any moment. This behavior was so unlike Zevran she had to take a step back, his normally calm and collected demeanor was slipping fast, the laughter that was usually etched into his face was replaced with nothing less than agony. Her oldest friend was breaking, and it was painful to witness.

"Zevran, look at me." She almost whispered, he whipped his head around, he looked defeated. "Zevran, she is here in search of you that you know, she is with someone very important to her but I won't risk her wraith by telling you whom. You of all people know how terrifying she is when she's angry. Now answer me Zevran, are you still in love with her?

He had to think about this for a moment, love was the hardest thing for him to understand _. Do I love her?_ He started pacing again, not knowing how to put the plethora of emotions raging in his body to words.

"After our fight in Amarantine, I left, nothing I've ever done was as hard as walking away from her. I cried for her Isabella. No pain has ever cause me to _cry,_ no Crow shows that weakness, but I did for _her._ I couldn't even take a whore after being with her! And now almost 14 years later I still have not. Is this love Isabela?! With a long sigh he turns to her, "Help me Isabela." His request was so low she almost didn't hear it over the sound of the waves.

"You're asking me about love, Zevran" she snorted a laugh, "There is nothing I can do to help you, only speaking to her will ease your mind. Lucky for you she'll be her by high noon. Wait for her."

He nodded in agreement.

"But when she's here let me take the man away first, trust me when I say you do not want him around for this conversation…"

CHAPTER 3

"Isabela!" Elissa screamed, as she jogged up the short dock to meet the pirate. "It's been too long" she said while pulling her friend into tight hug.

"Oh kitten, we met up a few weeks ago, I wonder if I'll get a much more…enthusiastic greeting if I disappear for a few months"

Elissa chuckled as Isabela addressed her son, "And then there's you, where's Auntie Izza's hug, or are you too old for that now?"

Although his face was still shrouded in a hood you could hear the smile in his voice, "Never Auntie Izza." He said while wrapping his arms around her.

Isabela looked over his head to the young man's mother, meeting her eye, nodding once. "He's here Elissa."

Zev turned around slowly to meet his mother's eyes, "Your friend we've been scouring the city for?"

She only nodded.

"Izza?" he started, "My mother needs this to be private, yes? Show me around your ship?"

"My sweet, you've said the best thing you could ever say to a pirate, let us be off!"

As Isabela linked her arm through her son's Elissa couldn't help but smile, _you truly are the best of both of us, my love_.

Not long after the duo was out of sight she heard his footsteps. The only reason she heard them was because he wanted her too. He could have easily came up and slit her throat as he watched the tension lesson in her shoulder, they both knew that he wasn't here to kill her. But knowing that didn't make hearing his voice easier.

"Elissa."

"Zevran." She almost choked it out, there was no emotion in his voice, and nothing slipped out to betray his inner turmoil. The same was not said for Elissa, in two syllables he knew everything. The pain was there, the longing was there, the love was there.

"I am here women, look at me!"

Slowly she turned, releasing a breath she didn't realize she was holding. Fourteen years ago was the last time she saw his face, she held onto the picture of him in her mind long after Amaranthine. Still to this day she would close her eyes and concentrate on the picture her mind brought forth, listened to his laugh in her memories, see the spark of something dangerous in his eyes, but more than anything she saw him in the face of their son. The son she kept from him, the son she was terrified he wouldn't want. She made his decision for him, and now almost fourteen years later she was determined to right her wrongs. But even with seeing his likeness daily, it didn't prepare her for seeing him again. He was beautiful, even more so than he was all those years ago, the arrogance was still there but his it was tempered with wisdom, knowledge and maybe a small amount of loss. But what she saw in his eyes was something she never believed she'd see. If you looked past his anger and obvious jealousy, you could find a small amount of hope. And only that made her speak.

"I have done many terrible things in my life Zevran, if there is a maker he is surely very cross with me. But nothing compares to how I have wronged you. I lied to you in Amaranthine. You asked if there was a reason why I was trying to push for marriage. I said it was my love for you, I lied, and it was never only that Zevran. I should have told you then, instead of pushing you away, I should have told you."

He watched her carefully when she spoke, looking for deceit, looking for more secrets than the one she still hadn't said yet, he found truth in her eyes, truth mixed with pain. _She is hurting, I need to right my wrongs as well._

"Elissa" he whispered, stepping towards her, letting all of the feelings he was keeping out rise to the surface. "I'm sorry, so sorry I put those tears in your eyes and the quiver in your voice, you say you shouldn't have lied? I should never have left. I was a fool." He said as he folded the small women into his arms.

Elissa surrendered herself into his embrace, tucked under his chin, she sighed, "I have missed this, so much more than I can say, but I wasn't finished speaking." As soon as those words passed her lips he knew the love she once felt for him was still there. Happiness crossed his features but was soon extinguished as she gently but firmly pushed him away from her.

CHAPTER 4

Zev wasn't stupid, it's not that he thought his mother took him for an idiot but the secrecy behind this little trip had him infuriated. He only half listened as Isabela prattled on about her ship and how she came to "own" it. He gasped in all the right moments, praised in all the right places, he played the perfect interested nephew, but his mind was not on Isabela's mess, and crew quarters and whatever else she showed him. His mind was on the deck, with his mother and the man he knew had to be his father. She made a point to never lie to him, she always spoke highly of his father, said he was more skilled with daggers than even she, she called him handsome and witty, and a charmer. The only thing she ever denied him was his name, he never knew his father's name, but he knew she loved him. Loved him enough to "set him free" as she put it.

He knew his father didn't know about him, when he turned 13 she told him everything. She spoke of how terrifying it was for both of them to fall in love. His father, was taught to never love, to only know lust and pleasure, but for some reason she made him forget who he was trained to be, she taught him how to love. She fixed a heart that never knew it was broken. She spoke of how depressed she was after Logain's betrayal, with her family murdered and the blight looming over them, she welcomed death. She wanted revenge on Howe and nothing more, death was not only welcomed, death was wanted. She forgot every feeling other than pain but he taught her how to be happy again, how to smile and laugh and take in all the beauty of the world. He put her shattered pieces back together. She taught him how to love while he taught her how be alive. She told him how scared she was to tell his father she was pregnant. So instead of facing him she fought with him, pushed him for a marriage she knew he wasn't ready for, and eventually it was too much and he left. She spoke of crying herself to sleep every night until his birth. His birth put beauty and love back into her world.

Isabela watched as he removed the hood from his face, "You better keep that on Zev, your mother will be furious if she catches you without it" the pirate said with an eyebrow raised.

"I'm tired of pretending Auntie Izza, he will see my face eventually."

She laughed then, "It's your hide she'll have not mine."

"Izza?" He asked, "How long will this take? I'd really like to meet my father."

A sad smile crossed her lips, "As long they need it to Zev, it's been fourteen years too many for the both of them."

Zev could only nod.

"The boy I'm with, the one I'm sure you've been wondering about. He is your son Zevran."

There was only a flash of shock across Zevran Ariani's face before a look she never saw directed at her settled on his face, it was the look he gave when his training took over, the look of an assassin. He was going to kill her, and if Zevran Ariani wanted her dead, she would be.

Isabella and Zev had already started walking back to the deck when they heard the shouting start:

"I have a SON?! And FOURTEEN years later you decide to tell ME?!" Isabella blanched, in the many years that she knew Zevran she had never heard him scream like that. The rage in his voice was all the younger Ariani needed to hear before he took off through the door to help save his mother from the father he never knew.

The minute the door flew open Zev took everything in, the daggers in his father's hands, the salty ocean breeze, the calculated steps of a man out for blood, the booming laughter of nearby sailors enjoying their drunken time upon shore, the pleading eyes of his mother, and the terror of her voice as she justified her actions, "I was scared Zevran! So scared! I couldn't do that to you, how could I take away your freedom when you just earned it!? I was selfish and a fool but I love you! But I BEG you Zevran kill me if you must, maker knows I've earned it, but not in front of him, please Zevran! Please!"

Zev was a lot like his mother, he was skilled with daggers and a bow but he used his voice as a weapon more than anything, but now was not the time for words and this Zev knew, barely a second passed before he was in front of his mother staring into the deadly eyes of the man he wished he knew.

With his daggers raised ready to strike Zev spoke to the blond elf before him, "I am Zevran Bryce Ariani, by my word you will not harm my mother, I'll kill you first."

Zevran's eyes widened upon hearing the boy's voice, seeing his face _It is like I'm speaking to myself in a mirror_ he thought… _If I was raised in the land of dogs and mud._ With a raised eyebrow he contemplated his son's promise. He recognized the truth in his words, for it was clear upon his face.

"Kill me you say? You are welcome to try."

They were matched well, the father and son, they both had daggers in each hand striking and blocking each other with ease as they twirled around in their deadly dance. Where the youngest lacked in experience he made up in speed, the boy was a blur and the eldest Ariani had to double his efforts to keep up with him. The fury in Zevran's face was slowly changing to something else entirely: pride, _the boy is talented_ he thought _my son is talented_ his mind corrected.

Elissa had stopped sobbing, not a single uneven breathe had crossed her lips while she watched the two most important people in her life duel. She eyed the older man warily, she couldn't be sure but she did not believe he would harm the boy. _My boy_ she sighe _d a boy no longer, today he became a man._

Isabela watched as the fight began, her daggers also in her hands, waiting for the moment that she would have to step in, he may be her oldest friend but if he hurt Zev in any way he would be fighting for his life from not just Elissa. As she watched the duel come to an end she didn't intervene just yet, the eldest Ariani disarmed the youngest and with a swift move that even she didn't quite see, had him on his back. She retreated into the bowels of her ship when she saw Zevran smile, throw his daggers to the side and offer the boy his hand _. Best to give the happy family privacy_ she thought while a small smile ghosted across her lips.

CHAPTER 5

"You, my son, know your way around a duel," he said while offering his hand, "I am impressed. Truly." He looked at Elissa then while helping his son up from the grimy deck, "You have taught him well." And in a voice that was barely above a whisper he added, "My heart."

Zev's eyes darted back and forth between his mother and the man before him, his anger was gone. In its place was love, pride and forgiveness. What startled him was not what he saw in his eyes, but in hers. His mother was always a happy women, it wasn't odd to see her doubling over with laughter, dancing in the rain or even chasing their family mabari through the castle after he raided the larder and stole the sweets. But what he never realized was how much pain was trapped in her gaze, even when she laughed the pain was there, barely concealed. He simply thought that was her look, he had never known her any other way, but when she looked at the man in front of her he watched the ever present pain disappear. And when she responded, "Thank you…my soul." Zev knew without a doubt that as long as his father was beside her no pain would ever invade her eyes again.


End file.
